(Slim's Love Sauce) Happy New Year One and All, from Slim Slimski. I love this time of year. New beginnings. Fresh starts. Throw out the old, bring in the new! What better way to bring in the New Year than with a dish of pasta.

You're saying to yourselves, 'This Slim Dude eats a lot of pasta.' Well, it's true. I eat other things. Salmon. Lots of fresh fruit in da mornin'. But pasta is my staple. This dish is one of my favorites, but then again they're all my favorites. I was in San Francisco with a very beautiful and smart woman and she ordered this dish in this swanky restaurant. We fell in love, with the sauce, and each other. What follows is the Slim Interpretation...of the sauce, that is...

My family calls anything you put on pasta a 'sauce.'  People from the Bronx call it 'gravy.'  But my family calls it sauce, so...

Anyway, there's this market that I frequent that has teeny weenie baby asparagus. If you can't find these, try to find the thinnest (Slimmest?) ones you can. Chop off the tough end of the stalk, about an inch up. Let 'em sit in cold water for 10 minutes, then rinse a couple of times. Peel the tough, outer skin, starting from the bottom of the stalk, and peel up - don't stab yourself! Then chop the stalk in 1/8th" pieces, but leave the tips whole. You need about two cups of chopped asparagus. Most people like to blanch the asparagus, but I say to heck with that. It's a waste of water! I like my veggies au naturel, so to speak. Keep all those vitamins in there. So, two cups of chopped asparagus, stalks peeled.

Then, wash and pat dry some portobello mushrooms. You'll need about two cups worth, but these guys are hard to measure. Slice them vertically (vertically?-you know, like you'd slice a hard boiled egg) into 1/4" slices.

Heat some good virgin olive oil in a sauté pan over medium heat. Add four cloves of chopped garlic, and cook until light golden brown.

Add one tablespoon balsamic vinegar, a 1/4 cup of chicken broth, a 1/4 cup of dry white wine, and the portobellos. Add salt and crushed red pepper to taste.  

Now it gets tricky. You need to add the asparagus when the portobellos are about five minutes from being done. The portobellos are done when they are firm, similar to a thin cutlet, so figure it out. I have faith in you. It gets more complicated, though. The asparagus, if they are teeny weeny baby ones, do not take but five minutes or so. The big boys take a bit longer. So use your judgement. You can do it! So toss in the asparagus, and cook until firm, but not tough. Add a bit more wine and/or chicken broth if you need more sauce.

Hopefully you have heated your water (over the highest heat you got!)to a rapid boil, and added salt. Add a pound of farfalle pasta. Penne would also work well. When the pasta is al dente (firm) drain and transfer to a serving bowl. Drizzle some olive oil over the pasta. Toss (gently!)  Add some of the portobello/asparagus sauce. Toss again, but do not actually toss up in the air.

Fill a dish with the pasta, top off with some additional sauce, and (this is important!) add some freshly SHAVED Parmigiano Reggiano cheese. Do not use your Trac II. Use the side of your grater that you never use. Thin slices of that marvelous cheese, on top of that sauce, and you're Closer to Paradise!!